Yoshi vs Microsoft Windows
by Gonzales512
Summary: Chapter 6 Done! Princess Peach gets kidnapped by a computer and it's up to Yoshi and some smashers to save her. Find out in this unique fic.
1. Kidnapped Again!

Yoshi vs. Microsoft Windows

By The Great Gonzales

**Author's Note:** Yes, I know you are all curious about what's gonna happen in this fic, but you're gonna have to read this very unique fic in order to find out. I was using the computer as usual, and I was thinking, I should make a fanfic about it starring Yoshi and some Smashers. It's the most original thing I've ever thought of. First chapter up!

* * *

Chapter 1 – Kidnapped again!

It was another joyful day in Yoshi's Island. The Yoshi residents in Yoshi City were doing their usual routines. That also applies to the Smashers in the Super Smash Bros. Mansion, who were enjoying their day. Yoshi, Fox, and Wario were playing Super Smash Bros. Brawl on their Wii and everything was going well. That is until a Toad came out of nowhere who was about to deliver some bad news.

"Guys, guys, I have some bad news. It may sound really strange, no I mean _really _strange."

"Yeah, did the toaster explode again?" laughed Fox.

"No. We couldn't even go to Wal-Mart 'cause you idiots blew it up the other day."

"Yeah, sure," grinned Fox.

"So anyways, I have to tell you something."

"You told us that already," explained Yoshi.

"Shut up. Anyways, this is gonna be strange. Princess Peach..."

"Got kidnapped. Give me a break," said Mario, who just came out of the shower wearing a towel.

"How'd you know?" questioned Toad.

"She does that every time. Well that's good 'cause I'm about to kick some Bowser..."

"Wait!" said Toad. "Bowser didn't do this."

"Yeah Mario. Don't you know that Koopas kidnapping princesses every day is a stereotype?"

"Okay, we get the point," Mario sighed.

"Okay," said Toad. The princess got kidnapped... by a computer."

The guys bursted into laughter.

"By a computer?" laughed Fox.

"I saw it with my very own eyes," complained Toad.

"Okay, we'll get Peach back," said Mario.

And with that, Yoshi, Mario, Fox, and Wario set out on the long journey to find the computer that kidnapped Princess Peach. They walked long miles on strange roads paved with asphalt until they reached their destination where they would possibly save Princess Peach.

* * *

"Circuit City?" asked Yoshi. "You know, people invented the car so we could drive here instead of walk." 

"Let's just get in the store and get this over with," said Wario.

They entered the store. The store was big as they walked into the computer section. They saw a whole bunch of computers. Then Fox turned around and saw Princess Peach on a computer screen banging the screen trying to get out.

"There she is," said Fox. "... but how are we going to get in?"

"Hmm..." the whole group thought.

Then Professor E. Gadd, who was coicidentially in the store, walked to them.

"I believe I could help you," said the old professor.

"Okay, how?" asked Mario.

"With this," E. Gadd said as he pulled out a device. It was a small, black device with a small lense in the front and a floppy disk drive below it.

"All I have to do is point this onto each of you and this will turn you guys into data form. Then I'll load you up into it. It's simple."

"Okay," said Mario. "Put me in the computer."

E. Gadd puts a black floppy disk into the device and points the lens at Mario. A beam shoots out of the lens, covering Mario entirely and absorbing him until he was gone. Then the data was being written to the disk. After it was done, E. Gadd takes out the disk and puts in another while putting the previous disk in the computer's floppy disk drive and loads Mario into the computer.

"You're next Yoshi."

The process repeated once more. Yoshi disappeared and was written to the disk. The disk was ejected and another one was inserted.

"Okay Fox, ready?"

He shined the lens once again and Fox disappeared from thin air and was loaded into the computer.

"Okay Wario," said E. Gadd nervously. "Here we go."

The machine scanned Wario as he disappeared into thin air and his data was being written into the disk. Suddenly, a beeping sound started and a warning showed up on the device's screen.

_The disk is full._

_Please insert another disk and press retry._

"Damn it," yelled Wario from the machine.

E. Gadd inserts another disk and the rest of Wario's data was finally copied to the disk and his bulky data was loaded onto the computer.

Then suddenly, the computer shuts down.

**End of Chapter**

* * *

**Constructive Criticism Proudly Welcomed**

Author's Notes: The action begins in the next chapter. Please review if you like this and I'm also accepting constructive criticism. Thanks for taking the time to read this unique fic.


	2. Booting Up Windows

**Gonzales says: 1 megabyte is about 1024 kilobytes, or 1 million bytes. Floppies have 1.38 mb.**

* * *

Chapter 2: Booting Up Windows

"Yoshi," said Mario. "Are you there?"

"Yes," said Yoshi. "It's very dark though. I can't see anything."

"It's 'cause some loser turned off the computer," growled Wario. And besides, being in pixel form is making me look fat."

"You're already fat," laughed Yoshi. "And besides, you took up TWO WHOLE FLOPPY DISKS. That's 2.8mb. I only took up 700 kilobytes."

"Why you little," Wario said as he started to choke Yoshi until a bright light shined. They looked at the computer screen from the inside and saw an HP logo on the screen. Then the screen went black as it said:

BOOT FROM ATAPI CD-ROM… NONE

BOOT FROM FLOPPY… NONE

BOOT FROM IDE… OK

STARTING WINDOWS

They saw a bar at the bottom of the screen starting to fill up as Windows was starting up. Then the screen went black once again only to show the Windows 2000 Professional logo with another bar filling up.

"Wow," said Yoshi. "I've never seen a computer from the inside. I wonder what's next?"

The screen went black once more and finally showed a blue screen and a box that said,

Press CTRL-ALT-Delete to begin.

"Great," said Fox. "Now someone has to log us in.

* * *

Outside the computer in the Circuit City store, a guy wearing a red shirt that said Circuit City on it pressed CTRL-ALT-Delete and typed in the password and logged in.

* * *

"Yay," they cheered. "We're logged in." 

The desktop and all of the icons showed up on the screen. The Smashers walked to the desktop where they encountered a file trying to attack them. The file, named killsmashers.dll, grabbed his weapon, named weapon1.dll and confronted the Smashers. But Yoshi was lucky enough to bring his own anti-virus software and killed the file.

"Whew," said Yoshi. "That was close. We barely log in and a file is trying to attack us. That's not cool."

They continued on the blue desktop where they encountered a bunch of shortcuts that seemed harmless but were hard to get through the clutter. Five long minutes passed and after Wario getting stuck in the Outlook Express icon, they finally reach the bottom of the screen. But something else attacked them.

"What was that?" said Fox.

They turned out to see the Recycle Bin about to attack them. (That reminds me. I've got to delete all the junk out of my recycle bin.) The Recycle Bin throws out files and coming to the Smashers like sharp knives. The Smashers dodged all of the files being thrown. Then the Recycle Bin makes his speech.

"Welcome to the lair of Windows. I guarantee you won't survive in here. I've already got the root directory "C:\Winnt\System32" preparing for you guys. And you won't rescue the princess so just get out now!"

The Recycle Bin throws a large file at Yoshi, knocking him down.

"Yoshi!" yelled Mario. Mario shoots a pixelized fireball that ended up burning up the Recycle Bin.

"No!" cried the Recycle Bin as he disappeared from the desktop. Silence returned to the computer as the Smashers got relief.

"Thank god that Recycle Bin is gone," said Fox. "But I wonder what he said about the root directory. This might be dangerous. Remember, we're now in data form and want to take extra care not to get wiped off the hard drive."

"Well let's go on," finished Mario.

**End of Chapter**

Author's Notes: Chapter Two is done. The Recycle Bin is just the beginning. What future upcoming threats wait for the Smashers? Only one way to find out. Keep reading and reviewing.


	3. The Start Menu

**Author's Notes: **I am sorry for the lack of updates but the guys from AT&T finally fixed the phone line for good. So I will...

Yoshi: Gonzales! You have 253 new e-mail messages.

Author: I'll read them later.

I do not own Yoshi, Fox, Mario, or Wario. Neither I own Microsoft Windows 95, 98, Millennium Edition, 2000 Pro, Server, Advanced Server, or Database Server, Windows XP Home, Pro, Windows Server 2003, Windows Vista (All versions) Microsoft Office 95, 97, 2000, XP, 2003, 2007, Works, Internet Explorer, Outlook Express, Windows Media Player 7, MS Paint, Microsoft Image Composer, Clippit, Dell, HP, Compaq, eMachines, Gateway, Toshiba, Logitech, Microsoft, (I prefer Logitech mice and keyboards over Microsoft) CTRL-ALT-Delete, Universal Serial Bus, AOL, the remote control... AT&T, who finally got our phone line fixed for good so we can get this update, SBC, Verizon, PG&E...

**Yoshi:** Your point? All you did was waste is a lot of valuable words.

* * *

Chapter 3: The Start Menu

The Smashers kept walking along the desktop at the bottom of the screen where the taskbar was located. They saw several buttons on the task bar and walked to it. There were the usual quick launch buttons, including Show Desktop, Internet Explorer, Outlook Express, and Windows Media Player. But they also saw another button with the Windows Logo and said, "Start" on it. Mario walked to the Start button and jumped on it.

Suddenly, a menu popped out of the taskbar and had many applications and folders. On the side of the Start Menu, it showed the text "Windows 2000 Professional." The first two options on the menu showed "Shut Down" and "Log Off Circuit City Computer" Then the next seven options showed Run, Help, Search, Settings, Documents, Favorites, and Programs.

Mario walked to the "Program" menu and a bigger menu popped out. It showed folders of all the programs installed on the computer, including Microsoft Office, Microsoft Encarta Encyclopedia, MSN, Microsoft Games, Windows Media Player and other programs.

Mario saw a program called "Command Prompt."

"Guys," said Mario. "Let's go to that program."

They went to the Command Prompt shortcut and clicked on it. Then a black box appeared with the words "Microsoft (R) Windows 2000 Professional" in it.

Out of nowhere, a file attacks the four Smashers.

"Hey what gives," shouted Yoshi. Yoshi takes a magnet he found and Mario tackles the file. Yoshi used the magnet to permanently erase the file from the computer.

"That was easy," said Yoshi. "Let's keep going."

* * *

Somewhere in a huge palace in the Root Directory of the computer, a weird paper clip-like person sat on a throne. His two servants gave him the news.

"Hey sir, we've got a report from ScamDisk that there are four bugs that are potentially damaging the computer. Should we send some Elite .DLL files to get rid of them?"

"No. Wait. We've already got the princess. We can get them two. Then the whole world shall belong to Microsoft. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Go my servants and get ScamDisk to erase them from the disk.

The servants left the palace and the paper clip-like object jumped out of his throne. "Soon we will control the world. Nothing can stop Clippit; Microsoft's most Elite Ruler. When we get those Nintendo guys, and the Sony guys which will be in a future fanfic unless we lose, Microsoft will rule the world. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

* * *

Mario, Yoshi, Fox, and Wario got out of the Command Prompt application. They got out of the Programs folder and saw another icon that appealed to them. "My Computer." 

"Let's see if the princess is there," said Fox as he clicked on the My Computer Icon. A window popped out showing the hard drives and removable storage drives. They right-clicked the C Drive and clicked on properties. They clicked on the Tools tab in the new window and something fell behind the Smashers.

"Hello losers."

**

* * *

Author's Notes:** Smashers against ScamDisk. It's actually called ScanDisk. More action next chapter. Special thanks to AT&T for finally fixing the phone line for good. 


	4. The Conflict

**Yoshi vs. Microsoft Windows:** Chapter 4: The Conflict

"Permission to see Gates," said a strange paper-clip-looking object. He was at the front of a million-dollar mansion in the heart of Windows. Two guards were standing in the doorway that led them to the owner, and controller of the system.

BILL GATES! ! !

"Permission granted," said the guards. The paper-clip-looking object hopped into Bill Gates's office where he was sitting in an office chair facing another way like some evil villain.

"Bill Gates," said the paper-clip-looking object. "I've got urgent news."

Bill Gates finally turned around revealing his face.

"What is it Clippit," he said, annoyed. "It's been a horrible week. Sales have been down since Vista came out and sales of Office are slow since I pulled you knuckleheads out of the product."

"Hey, don't blame us," said an orange striped cat. "I was the cutest of the bunch and you had us pulled off of Office. It's no wonder why sales have been slow."

"Shut up Links," said Bill Gates. "Besides, you bozos couldn't do anything about it."

"Do what? Make your product sales down. Apple is still beating us with their iPod."

"If only they'd put me in the Zune..." said Links.

"Why do you think that you should be in everything?" said Gates.

"Cuz I'm awesome. Besides, Clippit hasn't told us his report yet."

"Thanks for reminding me. _Stupid cat. _Please continue," said Gates.

"I'd like to report that the rescuers have unfortunately deleted the Recycle Bin and are headed..."

"THEY WHAT!!" Gates shouted so loud that the actual world in the Circuit City could actually hear his voice through the speakers.

"What the hell was that," said the Circuit City employee.

"Probably a mouse."

"What happened. He was my favorite garbage remover," cried Gates.

"Don't worry, we've got someone to take care of them for good," said Links.

"Hopefully it's our virus scanner," said Gates.

"Umm... we don't have a virus scanner," said Links.

"WHAT!! I TOLD U TO INSTALL A VIRUS SCANNER. NOW PEOPLE READING THIS STORY IS GONNA THINK WE'RE STUPID. WHO'S GONNA TAKE CARE OF THEM?"

* * *

"Oh god," cried Mario. "It's always some idiot trying to get us. Hey, box dude," Mario told the window.

"I am not a box dude," boomed the window. "I am called Scam Disk. I am a program designed to scam people and remove their junk. I am designed to remove _bugs_ like you guys. You are the bugs that are causing the hell Bill Gates is going through right now. I will eliminate you guys, and rule the world.

"For how long?" asked Wario. "I don't want to wait five years before I can rule the riches of you guys."

"Shut up," said Yoshi. "No one wants you to rule the riches of us guys."

"But I wanna," Wario cried.

"This is not the time," said Fox.

"But..."

"WATCH OUT!"

Just then, a bunch of files shaped like erasers flew just past Wario, missing him.

"Hey, what the hell was that for. I was just making a _deal_," Wario shouted as he pulls out an AK-47 out of nowhere and started firing at the window.

"Die, box dude, DIE!" Wario laughed.

The holes that appeared through the window unfortunately sealed shut as it healed and pulls out a bomb.

"This bomb is capable of blowing up anything," said Scam Disk.

"_**ANYTHING!"**_

"An-n-n-n-yth-th-th-ing?" Mario stuttered.

"Anything. This goes off and you're gone like BAM!"

Fox got out his gun and started firing at the window but had no use. Mario and Yoshi both hugged each other as they knew they were gonna die.

"You've been a good plumber and a great friend," said Yoshi.

"You've been a good dinosaur with those endless eating habits. You shall never be forgotten with those... Hey! I just got a great idea," Mario said excitedly all of a sudden as he whispered in Yoshi's ear.

"But what if I don't do it fast enough," Yoshi said.

"Don't worry, I've got your back.

"Get ready to die," said Scam Disk as he lit the bomb and threw it in the air. Mario and Yoshi both got ready to put their plan into action. Then Yoshi sticks out his tongue and swallows the bomb and turns it into an egg. It had an unlit fuse attached to the egg. Yoshi picks up the egg-bomb as Mario charged up his fireball attack. Yoshi threw the egg and with good aim, Mario threw a fireball to light the fuse.

"Holy crap," Scam Disk cried but pulls out a tennis racket and serves the bomb away from him, headed back to the Smashers.

"Aww, it backfired," Mario cried.

"Don't worry, I'll take care of this," said Yoshi as he pulls out a baseball bat and bats the bomb away at 150 mph. With no time to react, the bomb crashes into Scam Disk and blows up.

_**KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!**_

The explosion was huge. Scam Disk couldn't do anything to stop such a huge explosion. As the smoke started to clear, there was nothing in their path. Scam Disk was gone.

"Yay!" all the Smashers cheered through a video monitor that was being watched by Links.

"Aww, Gates is gonna be mad again. Better prepare Smashers, cuz Links will not let you pass."

"Hey what's going on Links," said Clippit.

"Oh nothing," Links said as she turned off the monitor.

"I've got a report that Scam Disk got eliminated," said Clippit.

"Who cares, that guy was no good for anything anyways. I'm sure it won't affect us that much."

"You better be sure Links," said Clippit. "Because our only allies left are Microsoft Office, which is us, Internet Explorer, Windows Media Player and Windows Update."

"We can still take them down," said Links. "Let's just hope nothing else happens today..."

End of Chapter

Author's Notes: Well, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I know it's been a while since the last update but I am really busy these days and I just didn't have time for updating. You should also check out my first submission of Mario and Yoshi on deviantArt. You can go to alfonso256. to check it out. It's not in color though and it hand-drawn but I'll upload a color version soon but since it's slow to edit it on Paint (a bmp file version of the picture is 20 MEGs big.) I'll figure out how to edit it. I don't have Photoshop or all that fancy software so I'm just relying on my hands to draw it. Anyways, thanks for reading.

- Gonzales512


	5. The Next Attack

**Yoshi vs. Microsoft Windows**

**Author's Notes:** Chapter Six is here. And to maximize your reading experience, I suggest you download Mozilla Firefox. This browser is way better than Internet Explorer and it's got tabbed browsing. Well, you get the same for IE7 but that's only available for XP and Vista. That means people stuck with Windows 2000 (like me) are stuck with IE6 and I don't really like it because for each web page you want, you have to have it in a separate window. But Firefox is so much better, it's faster, safer and it's easier to use. So get Firefox; it's free, at "/firefox" Hopefully it will increase your reading experience and other experiences of whatever you do on the Internet, like MySpace or YouTube.

Also, if you use Outlook Express for e-mail, try Thunderbird, also from Mozilla. It's more organized than Outlook Express and it's easy to use. It even tells you when it thinks that the message that you're reading is a scam so LESS IDENITY THEFT!! So try those products today. Hopefully, you'll enjoy the experience that I'm enjoying with Firefox and Thunderbird.

Well, I can't say anything against Microsoft Office since it's my favorite office suite and most of my stories are done with Word since I upgraded from Microsoft Works 2000.

Okay, enough with the chitchat. Now on to the story.

* * *

Links: Okay, that last chapter sucked, even though I was the star. I'm TELLING!

Gonzales512: Nice Try. You're bugging me. (Turns off Office Assistant)

Links: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

**Chapter 5:** The Next Attack

Meanwhile, the four Smashers were enjoying a quick break after the defeat of the Scam Disk. It was a nice sunny day in the computeristic world. Mario was munching on a 20 megabyte pizza that he had downloaded from the Internet, and the rest joined in. It was a joyous afternoon, (depending on what time the clock was set to. It was 11:30 AM but in the real world it was 11:30 PM. The Circuit City guys forgot to change the AM part.)

So it was a joyous afternoon as they enjoyed their lunch (plus they forgot to turn off the computers which is why they're still alive) until a noise alerted them. It sounded like a missile that just crash landed near where they were at right now. Mario immediately turned around but saw nothing but a trail of smoke that led to the crash site of the missile. The area around the missile was pitch-dark as the smoke covered the area. Mario walked to the missile and took a closer look. He saw a small note attached to the missile and took the note. He read out-loud to the rest.

"Dear Guys That Want To Save The Princess,

Your plot of attempting to save the princess is going to fail. Please give up all hopes of saving the princess and scram. Your Nintendo contamination is not wanted in Microsoft. If you don't heed this warning, bad stuff will happen. So leave as soon as possible. Thank You.

Sincerely,

Clippit

P.S. Try Microsoft Windows Vista today. I guarantee that you will like it and will want to buy it so we'll give you 50 percent off the regular price for a total of 99999999.97 coins."

"What a rip-off," said Mario. "My computer only cost 799.99 coins."

"Yeah but it has Windows Me. It's already 8 years old," Yoshi pointed out.

"So, everyone has XP these days and it's 6 years old," said Fox.

"So we're all outdated," Mario frowned. "Wait, who has XP?"

"Well, Pichu's computer, Dr. Mario's computer, and Roy's computer, and every other new Smasher in Melee. Everyone else in the original Super Smash Bros. game has Windows 2000, and the new Smashers in Brawl are getting Vista," said Fox.

"Haha," said Mario. "Unlucky for them. Vista sucks."

_**Warning: Author's Opinion agrees with the following. Oh my god! MY EYES! IT BURRNS!**_

"Yeah, one time," Mario started. "I was at a Best Buy, trying out the new computers when Vista was released and I tried it. Holy crap, I swear it's the worst OS EVER! The feel of it was designed for a retard and uses 50 word descriptions for simple commands, like changing the background, Screen Saver, Appearance, and other settings, instead of using the same way that they had always used. I don't like the way the programs menu was designed to be embedded within the Start Menu. I don't like scrolling menus!"

"Wow," said Yoshi. "I never thought you'd get pissed off at a computer."

"Yeah, and plus, I've got a lot of expensive hardware not designed for Vista, printer, smart flash drive. AND SOFTWARE TOO! In general it sucks."

_**Author's Opinion ends. Thank God!**_

Suddenly another missile lands next to the other missile. There was another note attached to the missile. Yoshi grabbed the piece of paper and read it.

"Oh by the way, if you talk crap about Vista, bad things will happen."

"Oh yeah, I'll show them," Mario said. "Vista sucks. Vista Sucks. VISTA SUCKS!"

Then more missiles start to head toward the Smashers.

"Run!" Yoshi cried.

The missiles came flying and crashing down on the field as the Smashers ran for their lives. Then Mario looked for the source of the missile firings and saw a big office building off in the distance and told the rest to immediately start running toward the building as they dodged the missiles.

* * *

Clippit looked at the Smasher from the distant building as they came closer and closer to the big office building. He got out a clipboard and started to take notes as he was preparing for another attack. Then out of nowhere, Links comes running in the room and scares Clippit, making him drop the clipboard and tripping and fall out of the window.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, stupid cat," he screamed as he plunged into the ground from the 55 story building. He stood up, brushing all the dust off of him and turned around.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, you guys scared the hell out me," Clippit yelled. "Wait," he said as he pulled out a picture and compared with the guys and the picture.

"You guys are the 'Guys That Want To Save The Princess' guys," he concluded. He continued staring at the Smashers.

"You guys think you're so tough," said Clippit. "Well get a load of this. Gwa ha ha ha ha!" he grinned as the skys turned dark all of a sudden, and thunder and lightning shocked the Smashers. A new enemy appeared out of nowhere and stood before the Smashers, staring at them.

"Holy," said Mario.

"Crap," said Fox.

"Where did Wario go anyways?" Yoshi finished.

**End of Chapter**


	6. The Sudden Twist

**Chapter 6:** The Sudden Twist!

Clippit: It looks like you want to skip the next paragraph. Would you like help?

Gonzales512: (flicks Clippit away)

A/N: You may be wondering but when I used to use Windows 2000 Pro before I went to XP a few months ago, I rarely had a problem/stability issue with it and never got a BSOD (Blue screen of death, aka when your computer freezes), unlike other operating systems (cough ME cough). WORST OS EVER, BESIDES VISTA! Also, I'm mad because sooner or later, they'll stop support for BOTH 2000 and XP. And 2000 was a great OS. So maybe I'm gonna be one of those people who are gonna convert to OS X. That's right Microsoft, I don't need your crappy expensive software and expensive upgrades if the good guys at Apple can do it for free. You'll be sorry when you start losing dominance to Apple!

Steve Jobs: Gwa ha ha ha ha!

Gonzales: No, that's not what I meant.

Jobs: Why not?

Three years later...

New story from Gonzales512,

Category: Super Smash Brothers

Title: Yoshi vs OS X

Genre: Humor/Adventure

Rating: Fiction Rated: M

Summary: The evil people of Apple sends in their iPods to kidnap both Princess Peach and Princess Daisy. Now Yoshi and several smashers must travel the Apple World and defeat Steve Jobs. Then they went to Food-4-Less and blew up all of the apples in the store. M for Mucho Action and delicious tacos and applesauce.

Jobs: Noooooooooooooooooo!! I'm RUINED!

* * *

The ground was trembling in front of the Microsoft Headquarters as their new enemy emerged before them. The sky had gotten dark as lightning crackled in the sky. Clippit, who started this whole mess, was still laughing as the Smashers met their ultimate doom. Then, suddenly, the world went blue and everything froze.

"What's going on," said Fox.

"I can't move. I'm frozen," Yoshi complained.

"Is this the end of Nintendo?" wondered Fox.

"Nintendo never dies," said Mario. "Time to beat those Micro-Jerks," said Mario as he managed to pull out a fix patch, disabling the Blue Screen of Death.

"What the hell..." Clippit's jaw dropped. Mario jumped and kicked Clippit, knocking him in the air, who got beaten by Fox and eaten by Yoshi. Then Yoshi laid an egg.

"Well, that's the last of him," said Yoshi. "Hmm... I think that's where Princess Peach is being held," Yoshi pointed at the Microsoft Tower.

"I think so too," said Mario. "Let's go in and beat those rich-wannabe better than Nintendo freaks!"

"And then play Halo after we're done," said Fox. But that only ended up getting himself choked by Mario.

"Don't you ever suggest playing games for the Xbox again," Mario yelled.

"Okay... I'm sorry," Fox gagged. Then the doors in front of them opened suddenly.

"Oh great, we're finally entering Microsoft's headquarters," Yoshi said. "It feels so weird."

Inside the headquarters, it was so busy with so many people, they actually blended in with the crowd of programmers, marketers, software testers, and many other people. There was a roofless spot in the area, showing the windows of the 55 story building. Mario decided to ask someone for Gates.

"Hey, excuse me but can you tell me where Bill Gates is?" Mario asked politely. _You idiot,_ thought Fox as then the man pulls out a picture. Obviously, the guy was a security guard and pulls the alarm. Lights and alarms went off as the many workers started running out of the building. Then things started shaking as four military tanks and a Windows Powered Hovercraft came out. They realized who was in the craft.

"Bill Gates," growled Mario. "What did you do with Princess Peach?"

"That's for you to find out. Besides, I found this dirty little thing before I kidnapped her in her room," said Bill Gates as he pulled out a white, stylish MacBook.

"This is the reason the world is going to hell," said Gates. "I'll see you at the top floor, that is if you can make it. Gwa ha ha ha ha," Bill Gates laughed as he pulled away from them and accidentally hit a roof. "Ow, watch it!" he yelled. "Sorry, my bad," said the guy piloting the hovercraft.

"Now, try to get me, Gwa ha ha ha ha! And pilot this thing right next time," Gates demanded as they flew away THUD! _CRASH!_ Instead of taking him to his office, the scene was followed by a thud and breaking glass, as the hovercraft had crashed into an office on the 47th floor. "Oh my god!"

Gates yelled from the distance as Mario and Yoshi snickered. "Jen, what are you doing with that guy?" Mario and Yoshi laughed.

Then suddenly, Internet Explorer, Microsoft Word and Windows ME came out of nowhere, led by Links, wearing a general's hat.

"It's time to empty the Recycle Bin," said Links. "You mean take out the trash?" idiotically asked someone running Windows ME Links slapped him, leaving scratch marks.

"Shut up. I can say whatever I want," said Links.

"Now let's get those bastards."

"CHARGE!"

"BROWSE!"

"EAT!"

"MASTURBATE!"

"WTF?" said Mario.

"What does WTF mean?"

"(sigh) It's a clean version of saying what the..."

KATHUD! Was heard in the distance.

"What the hell happened," said Links.

"That wasn't part of my plan."

"Sorry," said Windows ME. "My finger slipped. AND NOW I'M MAD! Time to witness a world of pain with Windows ME."

"That's why no one wanted to buy it," Fox said.

"And what does ME stand for anyways, Menso Edition?"

Then everyone in Mexico started laughing.

"Nah, I think it stands for Mistake Edition," said Fox.

"No, you got that from Wikipedia. Get your own suggestions," yelled Mario.

"Now let's trash those idiots." Then Microsoft Word started firing random letters with a letter rifle he pulled out, but Mario managed to dodged them as the letters flew by.

Internet Explorer started shooting viruses it got from the Internet at Fox, but destroyed them with his gun. Meanwhile, Windows ME accidentally started Windows Media Player and ended up playing the NFL on Fox theme song. Mario punched Internet Explorer, dropping a lot of viruses, which started to roam around. Meanwhile, Microsoft Word was planning his next attack but saw that Internet Explorer's viruses started to invade him, making him randomely fire off a bunch of letters at a time.

"What the hell's going on," yelled Links.

"Stupid Internet Explorer, I'm using FireFox next time!" yelled Microsoft Word as it kept firing letters at Fox, but ended up hitting Windows ME, killing off Windows Media Player as the NFL music died.

"Aw man," said Links. "That was my favorite song. You never ruin a CAT'S FAVORITE SONG!" Links yelled as she started choking Microsoft Word and scratched the paper on its screen."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" yelled Microsoft Word as it turned into Microsoft Excel.

"Let's get this done already," said Links as she pulled out a skateboard out of nowhere. As she got on it, she fell off immediately.

"Man, you suck. That old lady on the CarMax commercial can skate better than you," Mario taunted.

"Arrgh," growled Links as she got back up.

"Now you'll see the evil power of Microsoft."

"Zz.z...zzz... Links...z...are you thz...re?" came a voice out of Links's radio.

"If you haven't realized, Microsoft just fired you for knocking me out of the window. Yeah, Bill Gates was really mad. Oh, and I borrowed your car too."

"WHAT! I WAS ONLY TRYING TO SCARE YOU CUZ I WAS BORED!" Links yelled into the radio.

"Oh, and there's a missile heading your way too, because we've relocated. And we won't tell you where. Good luck surviving with those idiots who trapped me in that stupid egg that I was able to break out of. Gwa ha ha ha ha...zzzz.zzz.zz.z.zzz.z...!"

"Missile?" Links looked outside. There was a huge missile coming towards the former Microsoft Building which was now deserted.

"Not again," said Yoshi.

* * *

Woah, now that's weird. Microsoft firing their own baddies. What's next? Microsoft Word for Mac?

Peach: Um... there's already an MS Word for Mac.

Oh yeah. We'll find out the fate of the Smashers and former MS Allies in the next chapter! More updates coming soon!

PS: Sorry for the long wait :D Please review.

Flames from Microsoft are welcome :)


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